BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR News quiz. Hey, Maria von Trapp, climb my mountain. And the Bills are alive with the sound of music.
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KURTIS: I'm Bill Kurtis. And here is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.
PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody.
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SAGAL: Great to be back with you. Great show for you this week. Later on, we're going to be talking to Raphael Bob-Waksberg. He is the creator of the hilarious Netflix show "BoJack Horseman." But first, we took a little break, as you might know. And we thought we should probably summarize the news that happened during our two weeks off. Basically, night fell across the land...
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SAGAL: ...Leading some to believe that the world was ending, that our time here was over, that there was nothing left for us but darkness, fear and ruin. And, also, there was an eclipse.
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SAGAL: But enough dwelling on the past. If you'd like to answer questions about this week's news give us a call. The number is 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi, you are on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.
SASHA ESCANDON: Hi, this is Sasha calling from Los Angeles.
SAGAL: Hey, Sasha. How are things in LA?
ESCANDON: Hot. Very, very hot.
SAGAL: Yeah, well, that's how it's going to be from now on.
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SAGAL: So what do you do in LA? You part of the business of entertainment?
ESCANDON: Yeah, I am a professional organizer with Clutter for clients. And I also have a nonprofit where we teach improvisation to youth through music and dance.
SAGAL: Well, that's really awesome. And that's a very sort of LA life.
ESCANDON: Yes, it is.
SAGAL: Well, welcome to the show, Sasha. Let me introduce you to our panel this week. First, it is a writer for HBO's "Real Time With Bill Maher" and the co-host of the new podcast Live From The Poundstone Institute. It's Adam Felber.
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ADAM FELBER: Hey, Sasha.
SAGAL: Next, it's a feature writer for the Style section of The Washington Post, Roxanne Roberts.
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ROXANNE ROBERTS: Hello, Sasha.
ESCANDON: Hi.
SAGAL: And, finally, a correspondent for "CBS Sunday Morning" and host of "The Henry Ford's Innovation Nation" Saturday mornings on CBS, it's Mo Rocca.
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MO ROCCA: Hi, Sasha.
SAGAL: So, Sasha, welcome to our show. You're going to, of course, play Who's Bill This Time. Bill Kurtis is going to read for you three quotations from the week's news. Your job, of course, identify or explain two of them. Do that - you'll win our prize, the voice of scorekeeper emeritus Carl Kasell on your voicemail. Are you ready to play?
ESCANDON: Yes.
SAGAL: All right. Here is your first quote.
KURTIS: What a crowd. What a turnout.
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SAGAL: That was the president of the United States talking about the enthusiastic crowds that showed up to help him celebrate what?
ESCANDON: The tropical storm, Harvey?
SAGAL: Yes, indeed.
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SAGAL: There to celebrate the disastrous floods in Texas. As an enormous, lethal hurricane bore down on the country's fourth most populous city, everybody wondered one thing. How bad would the president screw this up? Hurricanes are not hard for presidents. You meet some survivors. You make a sad face. You hug them. You go to the shower in Air Force One to wash off the smell of the disadvantaged. It's easy.
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SAGAL: But this is President Trump. This is the guy who cannot figure out how to condemn Nazis.
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SAGAL: Was he going to say, well, there was drowning on both sides?
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SAGAL: He did fine. He did fine.
ROCCA: Trump did give a million dollars.
SAGAL: Yeah.
ROCCA: But we all still like Sandra Bullock better.
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FELBER: I will say, he pledged a million dollars.
SAGAL: He pledged a million.
ROCCA: Right.
FELBER: I feel like we've been down that road before.
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ROCCA: Right. Yeah.
FELBER: That check...
ROCCA: The hurricane...
FELBER: ...That guy's got the most complicated mailbox in the business.
SAGAL: It's really true.
ROCCA: Somehow, the victims are going to end up paying.
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FELBER: But, you know, I was thinking - and I'm going to make the storm pay for it.
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ROCCA: Yeah, but I was thinking after Arizona where he didn't really fill the arena he said he filled...
SAGAL: Yeah.
ROCCA: ..I think hurricanes - don't give him any ideas because it presents a real opportunity. You know, let global warming continue as the water rises...
FELBER: Right.
ROCCA: ...You want crowds - you just stand on the high ground.
SAGAL: It's true. They will come to you.
FELBER: They will show up eventually.
SAGAL: Yeah. But he seemed...
ROCCA: Yeah, listen to them. It is too soon. You're right.
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ROCCA: You're right this time.
SAGAL: He seemed to almost, like, enjoy it. He said, quote, "Wow." Quote, "floods are the unprecedented, historic rainfall," unquote. He was so excited. Can you imagine if, like, Noah acted like this? Flood's going to be huge. It's going to destroy the Earth.
ROCCA: This hurricane is bigger than any hurricane that Obama had.
SAGAL: It's true.
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FELBER: You got to give him credit. You got to give him credit because, like, one of his most common - underratedly common phrases is, like the world has never seen.
SAGAL: That's true.
FELBER: Everything is like the world has never seen. He finally got something that's like the world has never seen.
SAGAL: Yeah.
FELBER: It's 1,000-year event. And he got it. So he feels good.
ROCCA: All right. So Gorsuch and the hurricane.
SAGAL: Right. That's what he's gotten.
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SAGAL: Sasha, your next quote is coming from somebody who was reflecting on being fired from his prominent White House job.
KURTIS: I feel jacked up. Now I'm free. I've got my hands back on my weapon.
SAGAL: So who was finally feeling free and combative now that he was no longer officially at the White House?
ESCANDON: Bannon.
SAGAL: Steve Bannon, yes. Very good, Sasha.
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SAGAL: When the president moved into the White House back in January, he brought along Steve Bannon, who people thought was, at first, a weird kind of growth on the president's torso.
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SAGAL: But then they realized it was capable of independent movement. Since that day, Steve Bannon became famous for being the president's conscience, reminding him of all the promises he had made to his base, kind of like a Nazi Jiminy Cricket.
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FELBER: Wow.
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ROCCA: What's Jiminy Cricket's big song?
FELBER: "When You Wish Upon A Star."
SAGAL: "When You Wish Upon A Star," yes.
ROCCA: When You - Wow. OK. The Nazi joke stops there.
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ROCCA: Sorry.
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FELBER: (Singing) It makes every difference who you are.
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SAGAL: But Bannon was ejected from the White House a couple of weeks ago. I don't want you any - I know you're worried about Steve Bannon and his life now that he's unemployed. Don't worry about it. He's - apparently - and this is true. He's out of the White House. He is having the time of his life. He is working out, according to sources.
FELBER: Wow.
SAGAL: Yes. Imagine that thing sweating.
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SAGAL: He is even...
FELBER: Is he - what is he doing? Is he using heavier bourbon bottles now?
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SAGAL: One in each hand.
ROCCA: He's the next bachelor.
SAGAL: Yeah. He even...
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ROCCA: If he's working out, why do you think he left? He's the next bachelor. He definitely is. Ratings will spike. I'll watch that.
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SAGAL: He's even, according to one report we read...
FELBER: He could be on "Dancing With The Czars."
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SAGAL: No, his favorite reality show is, of course, "The Amazing Race."
FELBER: Yes.
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ROCCA: "So You Think You Can Goose Step."
SAGAL: He even, according to one report, started a juice cleanse. He was really excited, though. Then he found out it wasn't a Jews cleanse.
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SAGAL: Here, Sasha, is your last quote.
KURTIS: So now Whole Foods won't cost me an arm and a leg. It will just cost me an arm or a leg. Nice.
SAGAL: That was a man named Bill West celebrating, sort of, the lower prices at Whole Foods thanks to its takeover by what company?
ESCANDON: Amazon.
SAGAL: Yes, Amazon.
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SAGAL: This is the week when the new Amazon-owned Whole Foods rolled out. Customers went into stores to find prices lowered to the point where they were merely ridiculous.
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ROCCA: Alexa, why does this avocado cost $30?
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SAGAL: I can't help you with that, Mo.
ROBERTS: I can only say that Amazon, owned by Jeff Bezos, owner of The Washington Post, has made yet another brilliant, brilliant...
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FELBER: Yes.
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ROBERTS: ...Retailing move that will revolutionize the way Americans shop for groceries.
SAGAL: Apparently, you know, they're going to use some of their retailing techniques at Whole Foods, especially including data. They're going to track what you're shopping for. So it'll work just like amazon.com. You walk into a Whole Foods, you pick up, say, a Kiwifruit. You change your mind. You put it down. And then employees will follow you around going, well, what about this papaya?
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ROBERTS: You may also like this nectarine.
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SAGAL: Apparently, this is true. It's - they don't care about selling your groceries. They care about gathering data on you. They want to know...
FELBER: Yeah, that's what they - that's their thing.
SAGAL: That's their thing. So, like, you know, instead of some cashier rolling her eyes at you because of your dumb purchases, it'll be Amazon. It'll be, like, we see you bought quinoa and kale. Would you like something you're actually going to eat?
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SAGAL: Bill, how did Sasha do on our quiz?
KURTIS: She did perfectly. She got them all right, 3-0.
ESCANDON: Woo-hoo.
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SAGAL: Congratulations, Sasha. Well done and thanks for playing.
ESCANDON: Thank you.
SAGAL: Bye. Bye.
ESCANDON: Bye. Bye.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "IF I WERE A RICH MAN")
CHAIM TOPOL: (As Tevye, singing) If I were a rich man, yubby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dum. All day long I'd biddy biddy bum, if I were a wealthy man. I... Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.