PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can - each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?
BILL KURTIS: P.J. has two, Paula has two, and Hari has four.
SAGAL: All right.
PAULA POUNDSTONE: Oh, my gosh. Where did he get those?
PJ O'ROURKE: Hari's way out in front. This is going to be tough.
SAGAL: Hari's taken it away.
POUNDSTONE: Yeah.
SAGAL: Because nothing matters anymore, I will arbitrarily choose P.J. to go first.
O'ROURKE: All righty.
SAGAL: P.J., the clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, the director of the CDC said blanks may be better protection against COVID than a vaccine.
O'ROURKE: Masks.
SAGAL: Right.
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SAGAL: Also on Wednesday, blank said the director of the CDC must have been confused.
O'ROURKE: Trump.
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Tuesday, the UAE and Bahrain normalized their relations with blank.
O'ROURKE: Israel.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, Hurricane blank caused historic flooding in Alabama and Florida.
O'ROURKE: Sally.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, police in Georgia made a public plea for a man who ran from a traffic stop to come down to the station to retrieve the blank he left behind.
O'ROURKE: Pants.
SAGAL: Winning lottery ticket. In the first endorsement of their 175-year history, Scientific American magazine backed blank for president.
O'ROURKE: Biden.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Monday, hedge fund manager Steve Cohen reached an agreement to buy the New York blanks.
O'ROURKE: Post.
SAGAL: Mets.
O'ROURKE: Mets.
SAGAL: This week, a man in Malaysia who lost his cellphone and later found it...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...In the jungle behind his house discovered that blank.
O'ROURKE: Discovered that a tiger had left a threatening message on his voicemail.
SAGAL: (Laughter) No, that a monkey had stolen it and took a bunch of selfies.
O'ROURKE: (Laughter).
SAGAL: After stealing the phone, the monkey took dozens of pictures of branches and close-ups of his own face and fur. The man isn't exactly sure how the primate managed to steal his phone from the open window or how it managed to upload a sponsored post to Instagram using the dramatic cool filter and an embedded link to buy a waist trainer. Bill, how did P.J. do on our quiz?
KURTIS: P.J. had five right for 10 more points. He now has 12.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
KURTIS: And that puts him in the lead.
SAGAL: Very good, P.J. That was a strong, strong round. All right, Paula. You're up next. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, Nancy Pelosi called for investigations into alleged abuses at blank detention centers.
POUNDSTONE: ICE.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, the administration laid out plans to make the blank free to all when it becomes available.
POUNDSTONE: Vaccine.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: With the resignation of Shinzo Abe, blank elected their new prime minister on Wednesday.
POUNDSTONE: Japan.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: An outbreak in Germany can be traced to one American woman who blanked while waiting for her COVID results to come back.
POUNDSTONE: Went to Germany.
SAGAL: No, she went on a pub crawl. Her results were positive. On Sunday, Oracle beat out Microsoft to take over U.S. operations of the video app blank.
POUNDSTONE: TikTok.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Wednesday, blank announced the newest version of their smartwatch.
POUNDSTONE: Apple.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, passengers on a bus...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...In the U.K. were shocked when a man boarded wearing blank as a mask.
POUNDSTONE: A snake.
SAGAL: Very good, Paula. You're right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: Riders on the bus in England first noticed that one of their fellow passengers was wearing a coiled snake around his face as a mask when he got on the bus and was wearing a coiled snake around his face as a mask.
POUNDSTONE: (Laughter).
SAGAL: So congratulations, people qho say masks are dangerous. In this one very specific instance, you are right. Bill, how did Paula do on our quiz?
KURTIS: Paula. Look out for Paula. She had six for 12 more points. She now has 14 and the lead.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
O'ROURKE: Paula, congratulations.
SAGAL: So, Bill, how many does Hari need to win?
KURTIS: Hari needs six to win, five to tie.
SAGAL: All right, Hari. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, President Trump urged the GOP to support a larger blank relief package.
HARI KONDABOLU: COVID.
SAGAL: Yeah.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Monday, President Trump blamed the blanks on the West Coast on forest mismanagement.
KONDABOLU: Fires.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, the Fed announced they would keep blanks near zero until 2023.
KONDABOLU: Interest rates.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Tuesday, the city of Louisville agreed to police reforms as part of a settlement with blank's family.
KONDABOLU: Breonna Taylor.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: Police in Canada say they're on the hunt for a man with a semi-truck who has stolen blank.
KONDABOLU: All their Tim Hortons' coffee.
SAGAL: No, $230,000 worth of beef and seven hot tubs. On Sunday, Tom Brady played his first game since leaving the New England blanks.
KONDABOLU: The Patriots.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Thursday, private space company blank launched 60 more Internet satellites into orbit.
KONDABOLU: SpaceX?
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: A customer at a department store in Britain...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...Considered returning his new cutting board after he found a blank on the back.
KONDABOLU: Blood.
SAGAL: No, a sticker that said do not use as a cutting board.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: The warning label on the cutting board read, quote, "wipe clean only. Do not use as a cutting board." The man was surprised, but this is what he gets for going shopping in the section of the department store that requires you to solve a bridge troll's riddle before you can use any of the items. Bill, did Hari Kondabolu do well enough to win?
KURTIS: Well, he got six right for 12 more points. That means with 16, he won.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
KONDABOLU: Oh, my God.
SAGAL: Go, Hari.
O'ROURKE: Yay, OK.
SAGAL: That's amazing. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.